It’s been a year since my first posting on SubStack and I thank you all for joining me on my weekly quest to replace the word Nice with the word Kind. I will be overseas on assignment until July, so I am reposting some of my early musings. Enjoy!
As you read today’s reposting, I will be in The Faroe Islands.
Please share with anyone you know who needs a giggle!
My personal fall from nice began in junior high, when I rallied friends to TP the house of the constipated science teacher who gave me a C on my brilliant mid-term paper because I forgot to put my name at the top.
Things picked up speed in high school. We had an older neighbor who would hide behind her curtains and scan for scandal. Her boys were grown, her life was dull. I get it.
One night, as I returned from a date, I glimpsed her watching from the dining room window, so decided to give her something to talk about. I explained to my date that I would come around to his side of the car to say good night and asked him to grab me and pull me through the window back into the car. It may have made her year!
My junior year, instead of study hall, I worked in the high school front office where I had access to permission slips. Friends who needed to skip class enlisted my help. The challenge was to come up with excuses so personal that no school administrator would ask questions. Medical appointments were the best excuses, so I wrote with abandon about consultations with gastroenterologists, podiatrists and proctologists. I considered it creative writing.
The truth is, we can never achieve grace if we cling to perfection. Grace requires humility and honesty and courage and humor. Embracing imperfection allows us to laugh at ourselves, our kids, our boss, the neighbors, our thighs. It’s like taking off a bra at the end of the day…release the monkeys!
If we want to keep our daughters off the pedestal, it’s essential to own our shortcomings, explain that perfection is boring, and tell them regularly “Your job is not to please others…not boys, not teachers, not bosses, not god, not me.”
As I assess my own fall from nice, I am inspired by the words of my dear Thai friend who apologizes for her imperfect English by saying,
“My English is broken.”
I love this. What an elegant, guilt-free way to describe our failings. My cooking is broken. My patience is broken. My libido is broken.
Love this! "My libido is broken!" Hahahahaha....made my day.
This should be required morning reading! Thanks, Annie!